Our love is magical which can make dating a little more complicated. Find out some insights from a fellow empath to avoid repeating past mistakes and finding the love you deserve.
Watch for warning signs and take them at face value. Often times we see the warning signs and assume we can fix or look past them. The truth is we cannot "fix" those little things nor should it be our job to. More than a non-empath, we need a partner who is mentally mature and healthy. Our healing work in the outside world is enough; we shouldn't have to extend that exertion in our home and close relationships as well. See signs of dishonesty, jealousy, inconsistency, rudeness? Believe them and keep it moving.
The offer and exchange. A conversation around what one has to offer is typical in the early phases of getting to know a potential partner. We have a lot to offer in relationships with our deeply felt, intuitive and healing love. But make sure you're listening for what you're being offered. I recently starting chatting with a guy and every time we talked he mentioned things like "wow, you're just the woman I need" "you can help me to be better" "I need your kind of energy in my life." While those are very kind words and I received them with humility and gratitude, I noticed there wasn't ever talk about what he could do for me - what he would bring to my life. Before I knew it, our conversations started turning into therapy sessions. I was happy to be there for him in that way but quickly realized this wasn't the making of a healthy well balanced, romantic relationship.
Know what you want and need. This might seem obvious, but sometimes it gets muddy. It's an absolute must to have clearly sorted out for yourself what you want in a partner. I'm not saying write off someone because they don't check all the boxes. But by knowing what your boxes are in the first place, you can determine your absolutes and deal breakers. Once you have those figured out, don't make exceptions (getting back to the "I can look past it/ fix it mentality).
Be strong. Once you've made up your mind that a potential suitor is a no-go for you, don't cave! I've had guys try to change my mind through extreme persistence, with money, threatening to hurt themselves and all kinds of tactics. It's easy to give in and give it a second chance, but I've learned that doesn't really change much except you're setting the tone that you'll keep compromising. No more compromising fellow empaths!
Give yourself the love you give others. It's in our nature to love and nurture others to the point of forgetting to provide that same dedication to loving ourselves. Be kind, gentle, forgiving and compassionate with yourself. Invest in a self-care routine. Focus on cultivating your dreams and wishes.
The Invitation
Reflect on your past relationships. Identify times where your empathic nature clouded your judgment.
How will you avoid past mistakes the next time?
Make a list of the characteristics you want in a partner. Make another list of the traits you will absolutely not tolerate in a potential partner.
How will you revamp your self-love/self-care practices?
I'm outtie!
~MeohMiya